Well, here’s another topic I can add to my, “they don’t teach you this in school” list. Sex education failed me again. Just kidding!If my teacher would’ve pulled out a 10 Tips to Orgasm Simultaneously Handout, I’m sure she’d be fired and headliner in the local newspaper. We learned about ejaculation in school. However, I relied on rated R movies and mature television shows to teach me about the pleasure of an orgasm. I’m being modest- add soft porn to that list too. On weekends I would stay up late and wait for the soft porn movies to air on HBO. Every sex scene ended in a simultaneous orgasm. Therefore, I assumed that when I had sex it would end in a dramatic, loud, and simultaneous orgasm just the same.
However, sadly, when I lost my virginity I didn’t even get an orgasm. And as I began an active sex life, my simultaneous orgasm still never happened. I had orgasms (once I learned how to speak up and make sure he knows it’s not over until I get mine too) but I wanted to experience that romantic connection of simultaneously reaching a peak with my lover. Just like those girls in the movies.
Maybe this is something that has never mattered to you. But, I’m a hardcore romantic. I’ve always envisioned my love and sex experiences before they happen. And when they don’t happen how I expected, it becomes an issue. Therefore, I tried to really focus on achieving my simultaneous orgasm. I just had to know how it felt and if it could possibly be better than having a “regular” orgasm. It took several tries, but luckily, I finally had one.
After my first two attempts, I realized I wasn’t going to get a simultaneous orgasm with
First, I tried making him slow down and stay consistent with the slow pace. He had a habit of starting slow and then picking up the speed in less than a minute. He’d then always try to slow down again, but by that time it was too late. So, I tried playing slow tunes and incorporating a little more kissing and caressing while we were having intercourse to keep the motion slow. I was sure this would work. But it didn’t. It actually took me longer to orgasm. I think I was focusing too much on keeping his pace slow, that I wasn’t concentrating on having an orgasm.
I did not give up. I just incorporated another step. When I noticed our tempo changing too early, I switched positions and climbed on top. While riding I knew that I could be more in control. I could take control of the speed and focus on my orgasm. But, I know what you’re thinking… and yes, you’re correct. Riding normally does make men orgasm faster. Therefore, I also incorporated a few tricks to slow or heighten his rush. Now, I’m not sharing the details of my tricks, but I’m hoping you catch the gist and have a few riding tricks of your own. Hint: straddling, bouncing, frontward, backward, etc. But again, I’ll leave the tricks up to you. And, maybe we can discuss riding positions in another article.
I bet this already sounds like too much work to you. Please don’t judge my persistence at achieving this simultaneous orgasm. I’m just a girl trying to live out her fantasies. And, sadly the previous suggestions still didn’t work. I needed to add one more step.
Also, I know this seems an attempt to win a cooking competition, rather than have sex. But, I must say these additions to our sex routine were already making our sex life better. I guess because I became more involved in pleasing myself and breaking out of a predictable cycle of sex. Sex between couples can become boring at times. The same positions, at the same time and in the same places will all begin to become a blur. I was excited and looking forward to this simultaneous orgasm and it showed in our sex life.
Finally, the last step to reach my orgasm goal: I doubled up on penetration. Meaning while I was riding I also began to stimulate my clitoris. I stimulated by using a toy or fingers. This last step is very specific to my body. Clitoral stimulation is a definite method to make me orgasm. With you, it could be nipple stimulation, pinching, or dirty sex talk. Whatever it may be, add that for double penetration and time it to orgasm with him.
With double penetration, I was able to orgasm faster, and we reached
I’m an advocate for simultaneous orgasms. If you’ve never thought about having one I hope I’ve successfully intrigued your hormones to make one happen. I know as women we can’t show too much emotion these days. Men will definitely take that for granted. But, quirky romance desires will always be within us. Treat yourself to a romantic fantasy occasionally and have a simultaneous orgasm. You can be the girl in the movie. Just don’t expect a happy ending. After you’ve had that moment- snap back into reality.